Do you see what I see. May we all see love.
I would like to show you a video. And have you think for yourself what you see. I will tell you what I think you should see and perhaps what I think you may also see. It’s no secret that perspective is in the eyes of the beholder. I am here with a quick reminder of how perspective varies, how the heart hopefully prevails and of the challenge of how the heart and the mind have to come together.
You can choose to watch the video first (yeah) but at the very least, you are reading my words, but then you will really want to see the video.
Here is what I see. I see love. Pure, honest, self less and oh so hairy love. There is a boy who is shouting his joy at the mere thought of going for a walk. He is about to do one of his favorite things with one of his favorite people. What could be better?
Oh....so you see a big giant honking tumor? A disfiguring cancer eating away at this handsome face…Yeah. That is there too.
It is hard when there is something pretty awful quite blatantly staring you right in your face. I have been here before and I know how it can weigh you down. Mucking up your emotions and bringing sadness around more than it should.
So I say, let's don’t rain on the already oh so difficult anticipatory grief parade. No, really. Anticipatory grief is so hard. We don’t even always acknowledge or call it what it is and maybe that doesn’t really matter. We feel it, we live it, we know it's there. It is HARD to know saying good bye is coming. Even harder when you will be making a decision. THE decision on a good end to a good life.
Well then. Let’s go back to what we see, to perspective. It can change with the tiniest of tweaks or lenses. I recommend you see the joy. You embrace the moment and feel the happy. Seriously, we don’t get these moments back. I continuously remind myself that the path of living is also of dying and whether we are closer to one end or the other, we don’t always know, but we should always hold dear to this- Now. (Don’t worry, I know it is not always that easy. I try for optimistically realistic with a big dabble in letting the moment suck you in to the daydream that now is.)
I invite you to see past the sadness that tries to pull you in as much as you can. Perhaps allow some time set aside for ruminating over the difficult, emotional thoughts. (Those have to be there some too, but they don't have to rule.) Then move on to the goal to have more of the heart filling moments.
I choose to see a beloved dog eager for his morning walk with one he loves, not knowing what the next day brings. Hopefully more walks.
Hospice care at its best.
Now go and hug someone you love. Right. This. Moment.